An elderly lady on a cruise ship was holding her hat tight so that it would not be blown away in the wind.

A gentleman approached her and said,  ”Pardon me, madam, I’m not sure how to say this but…your dress is blowing up in this high wind.”

“Yes, I know. I need both my hands to hold onto this hat.”

“But madam, you must know that you are not wearing any panties and your privates are exposed!” said the gentleman in earnest.

The woman looked down, then back up at the man and replied, ”Sir, anything you see down there is 75 years old. I just bought this hat yesterday!”